The Ultimate Food Delivery Jokes Collection
Welcome to our comprehensive collection of food delivery jokes! We’ve gathered over 80 jokes covering every aspect of food delivery humor.
Short Food Delivery Jokes
Why did the pizza maker always get a great tip? He knew how to deliver under pressure!
What did the sandwich say to the delivery driver? Lettuce take this to-go!
Why don’t food delivery drivers ever play hide and seek? Because good luck hiding when everyone knows your delivery location!
What do you call a food delivery service for cats? Purr-dery!
Why did the burger go to the gym? To get better delivery on its buns!
How did the fries propose to the ketchup? He said, “We should get delivered together!”
What did the hungry customer say to the delivery driver? “I knead this pizza!”
Why did the tomato turn red? Because it saw the salad dressing on the delivery truck!
Why did the delivery driver quit his job? He couldn’t handle the take-out pressure!
What did the sushi say to the rice? “You roll with me, and I’ll deliver the flavor!”
Why was the food delivery driver a great musician? He knew all the right scales for delivery!
Why did the pasta refuse to work with the delivery driver? It couldn’t bow-tie the knot!
What’s a food delivery driver’s favorite game? Pizza – it’s always a slice of fun!
Why did the donut break up with the muffin? Because it found a faster delivery!
What’s a food delivery driver’s favorite season? Fall – it’s all about that ‘dine and dash!’
What did the taco say during the delivery? “Let’s taco ‘bout my delivery!”
How do you unlock a food delivery driver’s heart? With a cheesy pickup line!
Why did the food delivery driver always get invited to parties? Because he knew how to bring the good food vibe!
What did the salad say to the delivery driver? “I’m feeling a bit tossed around today!”
What do you call a food delivery service that’s always late? Late to plate!
Why did the food get a promotion? It was recognized for its outstanding delivery!
Medium Food Delivery Jokes
Knock, knock! Who’s there? Delivery. Delivery who? Delivery your jokes is what I’m here for!
Why did the person call the food delivery restaurant while waiting? Because he had a delivery emergency—he was starving!
Once a guy ordered a pizza during a thunderstorm. When the delivery person finally arrived, he said, “Thank you for delivering my dinner and for brave weather!” The driver replied, “You have no idea, sir! I risked it all for a slice!”
A woman called her food delivery service and asked, “How long will it take for my order?” The operator said, “Are you in a hurry?” She replied, “That depends. Are you on a bike or an obstacle course?”
Two friends ordered food delivery and one said, “I hope the driver makes it before I get too hungry.” The other replied, “Don’t worry! I’ve heard he runs like the wind!”
A food delivery driver walks into a cafe and orders a coffee. The barista says, “Want it for here or to-go?” The driver responds, “To-go! There’s food waiting at the other end!”
During a pizza delivery, the driver saw a cat on the doorstep. He joked, “Delivery for the king of the house?” The cat just blinked, making the delivery driver think he was waiting for the tip!
A guy once received a cold pizza and called the restaurant. He said, “I need a hot delivery! I called for a pizza, not a freezer surprise!”
If you ever get a slow delivery driver, just imagine them taking the ‘long route’ to find the best pizza joints along the way!
One time, I asked a delivery driver what he likes most about his job. He said, “I love delivering smiles! And sometimes, tacos!”
When my food arrived late, I asked the driver what happened. He said, “Traffic was a real ‘order’ in the wrong direction!”
A man called to complain about his food being late, and the driver replied, “I assure you, sir! I wasn’t just taking a gourmet shortcut!”
What do food delivery drivers do in their spare time? They practice their ‘deliver-ability’ skills and juggle pizzas!
One food delivery driver bragged, “I’m the best tracker in the business!” The customer replied, “Why? Because you track my hunger closely?”
A delivery guy ran into the restaurant and said, “There’s a mad dog chasing me!” The cook asked, “Did you deliver his food late?”
I once tried to order a multi-course meal via food delivery. The driver said, “We don’t deliver that! This is not a five-star restaurant!”
A mom called for food delivery. When her kids asked what she was doing, she replied, “Just waiting for my ‘dinner bomb’ to drop!”
Why did the delivery driver carry a ladder? He wanted to ensure he could reach new heights in customer satisfaction!
A customer once said to a driver, “You really ketchup to your promises!” The driver replied, “I try, but the delivery traffic can make it slippery!”
Long Food Delivery Stories
Once, I was waiting for my pizza delivery, and suddenly my doorbell rang. I rushed to answer it, only to find my neighbor’s cat meowing furiously. Confused, I looked around, but no pizza. Moments later, the delivery driver appeared, saying he got distracted by a cat fight down the street! I couldn’t stop laughing as he handed me my cold pizza, and I teased, “Well, it’s better than a cat fight!”
On one rainy night, I ordered Chinese food, but the delivery driver couldn’t find my apartment. I saw him wandering in circles outside. I decided to run out with an umbrella, but slipped and fell right in front of him! He laughed, “I swear, your place is a slippery one!” I managed to get up, drenched, and said, “Just like this delivery, it’s worth the risk!”
One evening, I placed a late-night taco order and forgot to specify no sour cream. When the driver arrived, he knocked, and the first thing I said was, “Did you bring me a taco surprise?” The driver responded, “Only if taco means a joke with sour cream on top!”
My friend once had dinner delivered just before a big thunderstorm. The delivery guy sprinted to the door, dripping wet, and exclaimed, “Hope your food is worth the storm chase!” My friend laughed, “It better be! You brought my dinner through the storm of the century!”
A couple once ordered a romantic dinner delivery. As the driver arrived with flowers and a bouquet-shaped pizza, he accidentally pronounced it “pasta bouquet.” The couple chuckled, “That’s one way to deliver love!”
I ordered pizza one night, and the delivery driver was so enthusiastic he burst into song as he arrived, serenading “You can’t hurry love!” I couldn’t help but join in, and the whole neighborhood probably thought we were two crazy folks delivering the joy of pizza!
Once a delivery driver accidentally dropped a takeout bag while delivering. As I opened the door, he scooped it up, saying, “That’s what I call the ‘diner dive!’” I couldn’t stop laughing at his commitment to the delivery!
One time, I had a cupcake delivery, and the driver misread my address, bringing snacks to an office party instead. When he heard the cheerful “surprise!” he’d received, he belly-laughed, saying, “Guess I took the wrong turn into a sweet destiny!”
On a snowy night, my food delivery turned into an adventure! The driver had to hike through knee-deep snow with my pizza box held high, proudly yelling, “This is what I call breaking new ground in delivery!” When he arrived, I handed him a hot cocoa in appreciation!
A mix-up with a food delivery made my night! I received a taco truck delivery instead of sushi. The driver laughed and said, “Mix it up, switch it up, that’s how we roll!” We ended up having taco sushi at home, something that became a hit among friends!
One day I accidentally ordered double the food thinking it was a ‘hungry deal.’ The delivery guy laughed when he brought up 10 bags and said, “Looks like I’m delivering an entire buffet today!” I gave him a tip and challenged him to eat it all!
When my delivery driver showed up, he was baffled by my three dogs at the door, barking. He said, “Looks like I fussed up brewing a ‘house of dogs!’ So, should I call a pizza or a dog whisperer?” We ended up joking about our love for tacos while the dogs circled around him!
Once, a delivery driver delivered my food with a bouquet of funny notes stapled to the bags. When I opened it, I found jokes galore! “Did you hear the delivery guy dropped the pizza? It was a ‘slice’ of failure!” I couldn’t stop laughing and tipped him generously!
One time, I received a late-night pizza delivery, and the driver was completely out of breath. He said, “I ran up ten flights of stairs to get here!” I grinned and said, “That’s one way to deliver a workout along with a pizza!”